I never thought the concept of death can be explained in TV in the most raw and sincere manner, the way it was explained in the teleserye Dream Dad. Out of all the places, here in free TV, on a teleserye.

Just a recap of tonight's episode.

Death has always been a very sensitive topic. There are many depictions, interpretations. In the movie 'What Dreams May Come', when you die, you go to a place almost like a painting, with all its colors and hues, sometimes bright and radiant, sometimes bright and gloomy. In the 'Gladiator', dying means meeting your dead families on a golden field. In most teleserye and films, dying is depicted as walking to a bright light with departed loved ones welcoming you in white, flowing robes. All these interpretation are geared towards giving those left behind a positive experience. Like sugarcoating a bitter candy.

But death is never sweet, and we should never pretend that it is sweet. When someone dies, they leave you forever, and they will never come back. They are gone forever. And if you love them, it will hurt, big time.

That's where I think 'Dream Dad' did a very great job of portraying. Baste explained the finality. He didn't add any color, like 'they are just sleeping very long' or 'they are with the angels now' or 'we will meet them soon beyond the pearly white gates'. Death is the end for the person that dies. That's it.

And there is a deep reason to be sad. Sadness is not something that should be coated on its surface with rainbows and ribbons.

Instead of sugarcoating, Baste moved forward. He told Baby that he will always be knocking on Alex's door every day until she comes out. He will always be there for her. Because that's the only way to handle death. We support those most affected and make them feel less sadder. Make them feel happier with those that are left behind. That's the most we can do to cope with death.

One of the best explanations of death on TV, and they even did it with a child as an actor.

I must commend the actors' performance in this episode. In that scene where Baste and Baby are talking you can feel Baste's sincerity thanks to Zanjoe Marudo's non-overacting. You can feel that Baby is really sad with the realization that Baste might die. That scene right there is topnotch acting.  Looking forward to more quality writing and acting from this series and in TV in general.

Here are my gutsy predictions for 2014.

A showbiz couple (Actress and director) will announce that they are getting married. Actress initials are TG, director's is PS.

A very well-known talk show host will be dating a politician. Host initials, KA.

A video scandal of a former child star will emerge.

A famous and very handsome matinee idol will come out of the closet.

A very sweet engaged couple (musician/singer girl) will break up.

A very big scandal/conspiracy will rock the foundation of the showbiz world. It will escalate to national level, as in Senate or Supreme Court. It involves very famous names in show business.

A local showbiz actress will be dating a very famous international star.

An actor will be found two-timing. Caught in the act with another woman by the actual partner.

A very famous artist will announce running for a key position in the national elections.

A famous performer/actress will get pregnant. The guy denies it. The actress will fall into depression and out of the limelight after years of fame.



There you are. 10 predictions for 2014. See you next year as we count how many has come true. Bye!!!

On July 30, 2010 the noontime show Wowowee ended its broadcast in the ABS-CBN network after 5 years of airing. It has something to do with the tension between Willie Revillame, it's host and the ABS-CBN management. It was replaced by another variety game show which was only short-lived as it lasted for only 5 months.

The network's producers then tasked the writers and creative directors to think of the strategy to entice the audience into watching the network's noontime shows again.

The writers were allegedly pressured to the brim, threatened to be fired if they cannot think of any great idea.

So the writers thought out of the box and went extreme. They formulated some new games akin to 'Pera o Bayong', which used to be a nationwide favorite. The following are the results of their bloody brainstorming.


Game #1

Name: 
Bahay o Buhay

Props: 
The player sits on a contaption up in the air, his neck is tied with a rope to the ceiling. The contraption could open its bottom making the contestant fall and hanging him to death. 

The Play:
The host offers a house. He asks the contestant to choose between 'Bahay' o 'Buhay'.

If the contestant choose 'Buhay', he does not get hanged. He gets a consolation prize.

If he choose 'Bahay', he gets the house or whatever is offered by the host and he gets hanged in the contraption thus ending his life.

The Negotiation:
The host initially offers bahay kubo. The contestnt will choose buhay since he knows his life is worth more than that.

The host offers a duplex. Contestant says, 'Buhay!'.
A bungalow house. Contestant says, 'Buhay!'.
A 2-story house with a garage. 'Buhay! Buhay!'
A 2-story house with garage and swimming pool. 'Buhay!'.
A mansion with 10 rooms, 2 swimming pools and your own rooftop garden. Final offer. 'Bahay o Buhay?!'

The contestant would hesitate. Thinks for a long time. 
In the end, the promise of a beautiful house overpowered him and he whispers, 'Bahay na po, bahay na po.'

At that point, the host pulls the lever and opens up the bottom of the contraption hanging the contestant to death.

The host invites the family and shouts their winning.
'You just won a mansion with 10 rooms and two swimming pools with your own private graden. Congratulations!'
The family cries hard. And jumps up and down.


Game #2

Name:
Pera o Puri

The contestant preferably female is inside a cubicle. The cubicle is close on three sides and covered by a thin curtain on front instead of a window. The contestants silhouette is projected on the curtain.

The Play:
The host offers money. He asks 'Pera o Puri'. 

If the contestant chooses 'Pera', the contestant will instantly get the money offered. However, a lecherous old man goes inside the cubicle to remove an article of clothing from the contestant and do something lecherous to her.

The host then offers a larger aount of money and the game continues.

If the contestant finaly says 'Puri' she will get the last amount offered and the game ends.

The Negotiation:
The host initially offers 10 pesos.
The contestant, knowing it's not worth it, chooses 'Puri'. The game could have eneded there.
But the host increases his offer to 100. Contestant chooses 'Puri'.
Host offers 1000. 'Puri'.
Host bluffs that this is the last offer, '10,000!'.
The contestant thinks for a while. 'Pera na po.' A lecherous old man then enters the cubicle and removes her top and does something lecherous. The silhouette is displayed. The old man then leaves.
Host offers a larger amount '100,000!'
The contestant does not hesitate, 'Pera po.' while sniffing. A different old man enters and leaves.
Host offers '200,000.'.
Contestant says 'Pera po.' between her sobs. A different old man enters and leaves.
Host says '300,000!'
Contestant says 'Puri na po!' while crying uncontrollably.
But the hst is persistent, '500,000!'
Contestant got silent for a while. In the end she says 'Pera po, pera.' Two old men entered removes all clothing from her.
The game continues.
At the host's offer of 1 million, 5 old men are already at the opening of the cubicle. The curtain is now brushed to the side leaving the contestant exposed totally while in a fetal position.
The host shouts 'Final offer! 1 million! Pera o Puri!'.
The contestant mumbles, 'Pera. pera na. pera lang. pera pera lang. pera. pera.' The five old men goes in.
And the host shouts, 'Congratulations!!! You won 1 million pesos.!!!'
The five old men jumps up and down.


The writers submitted their idea to the producers who then reviewed their idea. The producers' asked, "Are you expecting us to televise a person dying because of money and a woman being raped because of money?!?! This is ridiculous! This is a civilized country and we are a kind-hearted network!"

The writers' reply to them, "But Madame  people are already doing these things in real life. They are risking their lives in fireworks factories, in deep sea level workplaces,  and in less than safe environments. People are being raped in Quezon ave and other dark streets in exchange for money. We're just televising them and giving them higher amounts of monney for their efforts! What's wrong with that?!"

The producer say, "You know what's wrong. We do not do this kind of things in this company. Not under my watch."

The writers' say, 'OK, so let's tone it down a little bit. Let's just make people do death-defying acts that looks like performances like eating swords or whatever. Let's make girls dance in skimpy clothing. Which is what is happening right now under your watch. It doesn't really make a lot of difference to me. We're just taking it pro!'

The writers were allegedly fired from the station at that very moment.

The producers are not available for comment as of press time.


---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This report is highly credible. It is based on insider reports from eye witnesses according to the friend of a classmate of the hairdresser of the author's office mate's neighbor's text mate. 

A film may be about the story and adventures of the main actor. But there are other characters which are just as important.

From shooting bullets on target, to keeping the prisoners captive, they never get things right. It's a mystery why the boss still keeps them. (Maybe he gets their services for free.)

Seriously, the boss should consider hiring more experienced henchmen already, like ex-Delta Forces or ex-Marines.

Signature moves: 1. Shooting every object in sight -- except the protagonists. 2. Getting punched in the face multiple times (and act as if they were surprised.)



They provide comic relief to a somber tale. They know how to get things for the protagonist, guns, cigars, anting-anting, you name it they can get it. They stick to the protagonists side until the end (although they usually die first and never see the end of the story.)

(I hope someone makes a film featuring sidekicks in the lead roles and the big name stars only having small roles.)

Notable scenes: Being tortured and killed for not divulging the protagonist's hideout.




I got no particular artist in mind right now. But you know who this character is, you've watch them many times. The protagonist asks for an information (like where is the hideout or who killed the prisoners). But the informant  says nothing because he is afraid. But he is greatly indebted to the protagonist! Dilemma... So the informant just says nothing, he says he don't know that the location is in Brgy. 1234 City Hall. He says he don't know that Mr. Y is the killer. He kept his mouth shut.








They are those that are always there for the lead actor/actress,  as a friend, a sister or just someone who cares.

You know that everything will be alright no matter what the problem is as long as Dimples is there on your side. And you just feel that she sincerely thinks of your best interest.

(She almost always has that role in every single film I watch with her in it. She should have her own film already!)





He will open his house for the protagonist in trouble. He will give asylum. He will fight while the lead is still resting and healing his wounds. He will fend off the enemy long enough for the protagonist to prepare. But the protagonist does prepare fast enough. The uncle is killed right before the lead busts out the door killing everyone.



Priests come in different colors in Pinoy cinema

Ruben Rustia as the old school, no joke priest.
Cris Daluz, a priest with some fantastical/supernatural leaning
Subas Herrero, a priest with a dark side a la padre damaso
Lou Veloso,  a comic priest
Bembol Roco, the fighting priest

The church is an important setting in most films. It serves as a turning point for the protagonist. When the lead  actor loses hope after a big battle, he goes to church, blames God then cries. Then the priest comes and gives a sound advice. Then, off goes the protagonist on a new clear path.

I'd like to present the top 5 real life celebrity love teams in Philippine TV. Each of these may be the greatest, the worst, the weirdest -- you decide what you want to think of them.

5: Korina Sanchez and Mar Roxas

Are you feeling down? Have you lost all hope? Ready to let go? Do not.

One man's trash is another man's treasure. Sure it's been said too many times it had become cliche already. But I'm just realizing what it really means.

Who would've thought I'll find solace in a disgustingly bad novelty song?

As a backgrounder, let me just tell you, for the past few weeks or even months, I've lost hope. I feel I'm in a deep pit of sorrow for reasons I still can't fathom. It was one of the darkest times of my life -- as if my nightmares have escaped into my waking hours.

Until I heard The Song.

It was a song of hope, of living life to the fullest, of never giving up.

It was the legendary phoenix' tears which revives you in your weakest state.

It was a breath of fresh air for one who's trapped in a dark and solitary cave.

"May Asim, May Asim Pa!" sings the old wrinkly hag, on the tip of the plank but still fighting on.

"May Asim, May Ibubuga Pa!", sings the seemingly defeated but surprisingly sturdy woman.

You've heard this song-- a novelty anthem by Madame Auring that still managed to reach the airstream despite the widespread protests of many.

I implore you, take comfort in this song. If you feel like letting go, don't. There is always light at the end of the tunnel. Madame Auring saw this light and she has lived it by heart. So why can't you?


====================================================================

(Check out the full lyrics and a picture below.)
(Not suitable to the faint-hearted)










Ako'y maganda pa rin
Mabango, kaakit akit
Mga pogi at mga macho
Lokong loko sa alindog ko
Ang sex appeal nitong lola niyo
May asim pa naman ako

May asim (may asim)
May asim pa (may asim pa)
May asim (may asim)
May ibubuga pa (may ibubuga pa)
May asim (may asim)
May asim pa (may asim pa)
May asim (may asim)
May ibubuga pa (may ibubuga pa)

Ako, si Madame Auring
Mabango, kaakit akit
Mga gwapo at mga lolo
Lokong loko sa alindog ko
Ang sex appeal nitong lola niyo
May asim pa naman ako

May asim (may asim)
May asim pa (may asim pa)
May asim (may asim)
May ibubuga pa (may ibubuga pa)
May asim (may asim)
May asim pa (may asim pa)
May asim (may asim)
May ibubuga pa (may ibubuga pa)

May asim pa naman akooohhh...

During my pre-adolescent age, I was a very meek teen. I never stand on my own. I never went into a fight. I never spoke any bad words against other people. I was always the underdog.

I seldom encounter any conflict as I always try to avoid them. And If I do encounter one, I either run away with my tail between my legs or I succumb to the ground defeated.

Things changed when I reached an older age. I have to face people. I have to face challenges. But knowing myself, I know I can't beat any.

I tried many things to overcome my weakness. I went into learning martial arts. I tried shooting guns, extreme sports but I was still weak.

In my lowest state of defeat, while I was walking home one night, I pass upon a dark street. Something pulled me into walking farther in. So I walked on. In the end of the almost endless alleyway, I saw an ominous signpost telling me that it is some kind of gym-spa. It seems to tell me to come inside and I can't seem to decline. On each side of the entrance, two large, muscular men stand unmovable like stone statues.

As I open the door I felt a cold sensation on my spine, as if I'm a pig entering a slaughterhouse. I walk slowly into the dark hallway. On the walls, there hang pictures of notable artists. There were pictures of Mon Confiado, Allen Dizon, DJ Durano, Dennis Roldan and other esteemed celebrities. As I reach the makeshift reception table, a low, coarse voice told me to enter a room.

I entered the nearest room on my left. It was dimly lit. In my fear or panic, I misstep on the creaky floor and I dropped the key that I'm holding. I bent down to pick it up.



…



I don't know what happened next. I blacked out.

When I got my senses back I was already walking out the main door. It was already morning.

At that moment, I felt I have changed. I am a different person. I feel very strong. I feel brave enough to crush anyone on my path. I was overflowing with confidence.

That's how I gained my trust and belief in myself. That's when I decided to become an artist.

I'll never forget that day.

I have a confession to make. Back when I was young and impulsive I did something very embarrassing that I just want to forget. But I don't think I will cover that dark past forever especially now that I am on my path to fame.

I want to emphasize that I want to forget this past completely. I'm not proud I did it. I am deeply embarrassed down to my bones. I even sometimes have a nightmare of it when I'm asleep.

I am telling you this because I want it to come directly from me. I don't want others to tell it and then embellish it with other things. I'll tell you this in its pure, unadulterated form, as they say.

I had a relationship with a now-famous, old celebrity fortune-teller. Yes, that's right. I won't tell her name but you probably know her anyway.

I was foolhardy then, and I was desperate for fame and I'll do everything to get it. I met the old fortune-teller (let's call her Madame A. for brevity) in a bar in Malate. She was with some guys and gays. I waited until she was alone. When I had a chance, I bought a drink for her and started flirting with her. The rest is history.

We did a lot of things together; sweet nothings like me buying a sarong for her in Boracay, or removing a flake in her scalp. Or her letting me lie on her lap or pinching my "singit" when I'm naughty.

Soon, she started to bring me to her shows; Jamboree guestings, company parties or carnival performances. She never brought me to any TV appearances because she's not that famous yet back then.

Anyway, the bad thing is, I did all those things for show. I was using her to make me famous. I hope she will forgive me after all this. I'm not proud I did it.

To you, Madame A, I wish you luck on your career and may you find true love.


==============================
Anyways, I found this video in the internet. It brought back a lot of memories-- bad memories. Enjoy! (If you can.)

Please watch out for the launching of my album. It has 14 original compositions by yours truly plus a few hidden tracks, probably covers of some old songs. It is produced by an independent music label named Aspalto Records.

It will probably be released next month. I'll just update you on the details on the next few days. See ya!


..

This week I spent my vacation in Boracay. A lot happened during my stay. I witnessed the fiasco between the Bb. Pilipinas-World Danielle Castaño and a local resident. Well, not really witnessed, I just saw the aftermath but I managed to smell Castano's fragrant perfume.

Also during the week, I 'witnessed' another chorva, this time involving two sexbomb dancers, Aifah and Rochelle. Again, I did not see what really happened but I was close enough. I even touched Rochelle's sarong.

Just yesterday, I was soaping my body in the foaming Boracay waters under the moon and guess who I saw. The Madrigal sisters! I even shook the hand of the younger sister and pecked the check of the older. How cool is that.

That's all of my celebrity sightings report ladies and gentlemen. I just regret not seeing any talent scouts or getting seen by the press there. It could have been my time to shine.

If you want total entertainment, you should go to cosplays. And by entertainment I don't mean the wholesome fun one. I mean entertainment such that you will find hilarity and stupidity of the human race all packed into one venue.

Have you ever gone to free concerts where a multitude of youth in black garbs - orcs, black shirts, jologs, call them what you want - they all gather in the concert as if a secret beacon sends a secret transmission to all of them to gather at that specific location. It's funny, right?

Well, in cosplays, you will find the same kind of people but instead of jologs from squatters, these are rich kidz in well-spent on clothes.

Cases in point:

1. In our province, there is a device used to catch fish in shallow waters. We call those, saklub. This one guy (Cosplayer 1) has a saklub for his headpiece!
























2. This girl (Cosplayer 2) has her hair made up of seaweeds!!! And this is what her parents struggle to earn money for.
























3. Lastly, here is a fag in authentic fag clothing (Cosplayer 3). Say what you want in defense, but dude, that is so gay.
























(Disclaimer: This pictures are not mine. I found it in flicker: treasure cove of the internet)

I went to my cousin Albert's birthday bash a few days ago in Pangasinan. I've never been in the province for quite a while now so this event is so refreshing for me. Many things have change since the last time I went here. Albert is already married, can you believe that!

We had a few drinks and a lot of food and a lot more fun. I'm looking forward to my next vacation there. I want to share this slice of my life because this cousin of mine is the one who encouraged me to pursue my career as an artist. He is the first one who believed in me.











Old friends' reunited.












I don't know this guy.












Picture perfect couple.












Food! Food! Food!












One sweet couple.

These are not my thoughts. These are just representations, in the forms of letters and words, of what I am thinking at the moment.

As such, this will reflect all my adventures and misadventures, my fortunes and misfortunes and what not.

More specifically, this will document my struggles as I move myself higher up in my career as an artist.

Watch out for my journeys. And help me please, if you can.